We kicked up a bit of dust here at The Morning Adam™ when we shared the importance of never letting a good f&%*!p go to waste.
Since that edition went live just over a month ago, we’ve kept count of the number of times we’ve found it necessary to remind a coaching or consulting client, or even a friend of ours in an online discussion forum for a mastermind we belong to, why this is important.
More than twenty, right off the top of our head, as of this writing.
With that in mind, let’s quickly review the steps for handling the process of
Seriously, Royally, Totally F&%*!&g Up Like The Boss YOU ARE
A long time ago, a friend of ours who worked as a department supervisor was counseling a subordinate who made a big mistake. The focus of his coaching and message of encouragement can be summed up in this phrase:
The reason I’m a manager is because I’ve f&%*!ed up a lot more than you have. That’s how I got here!
We get it.
We agree, the only way to truly understand success is to understand failure, to understand falling short, to understand f&%*!&g up from time to time.
You can’t appreciate the view from the summit unless you’ve looked up from the valley.
With all that in mind,
The Simple Steps To Doing This Like A Pro
STEP ONE: Decide whether an apology is necessary. Ask these questions:
- “Did I make the best decision based on the information I had at the time?”
- “In retrospect, could I have handled that differently?”
- “Was I obviously high on catnip that day and just totally lost my head doing something totally out of character?”
- “Is it possible I thought I knew everything about social grace, but this just goes to show that continuous education is called that for a reason?”
- “Do I have to be ‘right’ here?”
We will defer to your own sense of what’s right, however we’ve found that in 100% of cases, just hearing an apology will make this go a lot smoother for the other people involved.
As a leader, you will GAIN stature in their eyes by showing you’re not too big to apologize.
More stature = more influence.
So, this goes to
STEP TWO: Apologize like the honest-to-God baller and entrepreneurial gangsta you are.
No rambling preamble (or similar half-assed attempts at a rhyme).
No “but look at what the other people did.”
You don’t ALWAYS have to use the words “I apologize” or “I’m sorry” – there are a number of ways to phrase it that get the message across loud, clear, and concise.
On the last point: by making the first move, you’ve already gained stature over the other people who may carry a portion of the responsibility; and if they don’t own up for their end of it, you were the bigger person.
A LEADER is the biggest person in the room – that will be you.
STEP THREE: Invest in silver.
Remember that thing about clouds?
We’ve already covered this in detail, so refer back to the previous article, which flows directly, naturally, and sequentially from here.
Put Together, This Will All Make You The Biggest, Winningest Player On The Field
Let the others carry around the weight of the hate.
You – shake it off, handle it LIKE A BOSS, and let the others become bear snacks (to entertain another analogy).